What I Am Not Going To Miss......

As my last entry shows there are a lot of things that I will miss from Korea. But there will also be things I definitely won’t be sad to leave behind. There’s no denying that Korea has a way of getting under your skin and teaching in Korea is an easy life to lead. The job itself isn’t greatly challenging, the accommodation is free and the pay is fantastic, and by and large you can adapt to living in South Korea without major incident. Unless you have a tendency to fall over and injure yourself that is. Nonetheless, there are some things about living here that drive me a little bit crazy. From blaming a lack of understanding on “cultural differences,” to unscheduled schedule changes, to the fact rock, paper, scissors is THE ultimate decider, there can be some hiccups along the way.

Number one on my list of things I am not going to miss is Christina. If I had a Christmas card list it’s fairly safe to assume that Christina wouldn’t be on it. To be honest, with the schedule changes and constant academy glitches I can almost write that off as bad management and poor organisational skills, but with my ankle injury she has outright lied to me.

괜찮 아요? 아니 a million times over!

On 2^nd April I went back to the hospital to get a new prescription of painkillers, but this time I was taken by Soon and April two of my adult students. My doctor was the one who had barely glanced at me at the previous appointments. So imagine my surprise when he opened his mouth and spoke English to me. I know that I am the foreigner here and in order to make my own life easier I should have learnt more Korean, but surely his job would have been easier if he had spoken English to me in the first place. Since thanks to Christina and her “mistranslations” I didn’t walk on my ankle when I should have, I didn’t have any physical therapy, and I didn’t have pain medication and anti-inflammatory drugs. I have no idea why Christina “mistranslated” these things to me, and despite the fact she is potentially the best Korean at English in Hongseong I am under no inclination to have a discussion with her about it. Sure, it was a step in the right direction when I started getting the right treatment, and it turns out my googling was correct-it is a high ankle sprain, but all this could have possibly been avoided if the doctor had catered to his patient rather than his pride, and Christina had spared a second of her time to ensure her commodity (me) was healthy and mobile.

I am not going to miss the hospital. I have made eight trips to the hospital since I tripped over, and one time I left with a burn on my leg from the hot packs I was being treated with during the physical therapy. Aside from been scarred, I had the pleasure of being told my injury would recover more quickly if I lost weight, because I am “too heavy” apparently. I am sure my slow recovery time has nothing to do with Charlie neglecting to tell me not to walk on it at all after my first visit. I am sure my slow recovery time has nothing to do with my ankle being sat on by a 14 year old. I am sure my slow recovery time has nothing to do with lack of painkillers and anti-inflammatory drugs for the first month. I know I didn’t help matters with my refusal to let this injury slow me down completely, and also the fact I fell over on the train and landed on my ankle definitely didn’t do me any favours, but I reject the notion that my weight is an issue. For starters, I have lost a lot weight since I arrived in Korea, I am happy with my body image. They are called hips, I am sure they were covered somewhere in anatomy class.

As so many of my blog entries may have suggested I am not a huge fan of all the schedule changes I have had to put with. You may have picked up on this, I have tried to be subtle. To be sure, it’s a very nice feeling when the kids are visibly saddened by the news that they don’t have my class, but the amount of large minute changes that occur is astounding. Just one example, last Friday my manager told me three of my classes were cancelled and I could go home after dinner, and just as I was walking out the door one of the classes was back on. This all took place in under 15 minutes. Unlike Christina at least the current manager sometimes tries to offer an explanation. However, the whole set-up is made awkward by the fact many of the students seem to have a better grasp of English then he does. In some ways I worry that this year may have had a detrimental effect on my work ethic. Time wasted making worksheets and planning activities for classes that never take place does decrease the time I am willing to spend preparing. More crucially, I get no say in who goes in what class and when I do make a suggestion it’s more often than not ignored, leaving me with a group of students who can have a high level conversation and a couple of students who can barely answer what they had for lunch (Rice, kimchi, soup) or dinner the previous night (wait for it….rice, kimchi and soup!).

One thing I am definitely not going to miss is the religious awakenings that occur from time to time-usually early in the morning. As in being woken up by religious people who try to “enlighten” me and are seemingly not deterred by the fact I don’t speak Korean. No fear, we have an Engrishee pamphlet here somewhere. Some of you are probably wondering why I still answer my door after all the hassle I had with Mr “no-key” Landlord, but in Korea there is a tendency to keep hammering on your door until someone answers or it falls off its hinges, which ever comes first.

I am not going to miss the celebrity status that comes with being a 외국인 (foreigner) in Korea. Of course I am going to miss the perks, especially “service” and the freebies on the train when someone wants to try out their English. But I not going to miss being stared at everywhere I go. I am not going to miss the ignorance, or the assumption that I am an American or a Russian. (Being asked if you are Russian in Korea is a bit of a double edged sword-because it often means they think you are beautiful, but it also means they think you are a prostitute).

The amazement that I can handle spicy food or use chopsticks can wear a bit thin after a while. But being told that because Koreans use chopsticks they are better at doing things with their hands was a concept I found difficult to stomach. Apparently it makes them good hairdressers. I have some students that suggest otherwise. There is a bit of a Korea is number one mentality that I find really quite ugly. I am all for national pride, in moderation, but being asked if we have boiled eggs in England, seriously? “No sorry, Korea has the monopoly on hens and water.”

I am not going to miss the shuffling sound of the black and white flip-flops or “slippers” on the tarmac.

I am definitely not going to miss the spitting…..

But as I was writing this list I realised that the list of things I am going to miss is much longer, and in many ways more substantial. Don’t worry, I am not planning on caving into my students requests for me to stay out here, I am just glad to be leaving while I still like the place.

You Guessed It-Schedule Woes.

Well Christina has excelled herself this time, no doubt about that. My next entry was going to be about the fabulous time I had with Viro in Thailand, but I need to get this out my system first so bear with me. I looked back through my blog the other day and I know most of my time here has been blighted by schedule changes. But honestly I am surprised Christina bothers to put anything to paper, since before the ink has dried it is being changed to suit her. At least that’s the conclusion I am drawing, having not been told anything to the contrary.

Aside from the split in my day between the adult class and the children classes I was enjoying the lessons and I like most of my students. In all truthfulness I think this is the best bunch of kids I have taught so far, and aside from the fact I have to drag myself out of bed to teach them in the morning I like the adult students too. Only one class is a chore, and that’s because the girls in it are so quiet you can hear a pin drop from Japan. But, as has been the case here too many times, just when I get into a routine the carpet is pulled out from under me and I am left lying on a bed of useless lessons plans and straddling a gap wider than the space between Christina’s ears.

Although I know hagwon schedules are dependent on demand, pushy mothers and the Korean public school calendar, I don’t know anyone who has had to undergo the same number of adjustments and last minutes frustrations as I have faced here. I think that it would be a lot easier to deal with if I was given some kind of explanation now and again, never mind a warning. Even with a schedule Christina teaches her classes to her own time zone, which essentially involves running over my into my class time and expecting me to combine two different levels and age groups into one class. I gave up politely reminding her what the time was and used the time “researching” on the BBC website and messaging on facebook. Despite the fact she is the manager she literally comes in to teach her classes and then disappears faster than you can say-“Would it be possible to have a staff meeting so we can discuss the students and the schedule?”

Although it’s been chopped and changed today’s schedule is pretty indicative of what occurred in January. (This is largely just for my own memories so feel free to skip it!)

10-11 Adult Class. This early morning (for me) class consists of three ladies in their early to late thirties, plus one intermittent guest who shows up when the others blackmail her. They all have a fantastic grasp of the English language although one only talks using idioms and random phrases. This is where my poor teaching skills are apparent. For the most part I understand what they are saying and trying to convey which make it’s difficult for me to correct them. But through this class I am given a small insight into some Korean customs, including those surrounding Lunar New Year. Worryingly one of students is absent at least once a week because she gets so drunk the previous night “she has a blackout” and can’t remember what she had did. After this class I head back home until around 1.40 when I head back into the hagwon for the classes with the children.


2.20-3.10 Beginners. See the picture above. Five of the cutest kids in Hongseong (sure I am biased. I still haven’t met Henry!). Jenny (the blur-she is camera shy), Jullea (“Hello, Miss Jo”), Cindy, and the twins Alice and Diane. I am supposed to spend 50 minutes teaching them what’s on a random collection of flashcards-which would be as much fun as pulling teeth with a blunt tooth pick. Instead I am teaching them how to ask and answer simple questions. Can you….? Are you…..? Do you……? And so on. Despite the fact she knows all the answers left, right and centre Jenny is very patient and understands that she should let the others answer too-she’s the youngest in the class and she’s my little star.

3.10-4.00. Basic Speaking. Ann, Lita (yes really and no explanations that her name sounds like a measurement of liquid will persuade her otherwise) and Sarah (the opposite of Jenny and as such my least favourite child). This is the most frustrating class, mainly because Lita makes everything an uphill struggle. She is one of the family of five siblings, the rest of which are a joy to teach…but hopefully she will grow out of it.



4.00-4.50. Intermediate One. Andy, Jinny and Sally. See above. I have not been consulted about any of my students and their abilities, if I had been I would have suggested Andy is too weak for this class. A factor not helped by the fact Jinny (or Rachel as she was called at New Briton) can be a little bully. Looking at my new schedule it looks like this has been taken into consideration which should mean less tears of frustration from the poor chap. Sally is the reason I love teaching because she has such a thirst for English and a real desire to learn.

4.50-5.40. Intermediate Two. Yun Seob, Sonia, and May. Yun Seob is the first student I have had who doesn’t want an English name, which is perfectly fair enough. A bigger concern came when it appeared that he didn’t like anything….at all.
Me: Yun Seob, do you like music?
YS: No.
Me: Really? Why?
YS: Just.
But after a couple of weeks he warmed to me and I can even coax coherent sentences out of him. Sonia and May work well together, (see below) and make every lesson a good laugh. This is the one class where there is not even the pretence of a book yet with these kids 50 minutes flies by.


7.10-7.40. Intermediate Three. Branden, Tom, Jun and Angela. It annoys me that the time with my best class is so short-sometimes Christina overruns so much I only get 10 minutes with them-other times I have to combine their class with the Middle School one. They have the best English ability, and since Angela was put in this class-after 2 quiet weeks in the Middle School one- everyday has been an eye-opener. I am just working on their sentence formation at the moment, but they are a very bright bunch-although Branden is imitating my sarcasm-which can only be a bad thing!

7.40-8.30. Middle School-Park Gun, Seok Jae, Jae. My main job with these boys is getting them to talk-they all know lots of English words, but when it comes to expressing themselves they are a lot weaker. They also think they can cheat when we play “Hot Seat” by talking in Korean. Awww bless.

But as of tomorrow this all change, and the only reason I know this is because I happened to spot an altered timetable over Charlie’s shoulder. During my break between lessons I sit in the main room planning the lessons for the next day. This is made apparent by the books around me (it’s not like I am trying to learn English from them) and the fact that when the kids crowd around me and ask me what I am doing I respond “Jo Teacher is planning lessons for tomorrow.” It would have taken less than ten seconds for Christina to say “tomorrow, new schedule” but that would have been too easy. It appears that I will no longer be teaching either the beginner class or the middle school one. But crucially my first class (after the adult one) won’t start until 4.50-so if I hadn’t noticed the new schedule I would have gone in at 1.40 for no good reason. I think the reason Christina didn’t tell me anything is because I will be finishing at 9.20-which is something I have been fighting since the first draft of the schedule 2000 drafts ago.

The truth of the matter is 3 months ago I would have been more pissed off than a kimchi farmer after a bad harvest but now I am just blah. Aside from the impending knackeredness my biggest gripe about finishing so late is it means I won’t see anyone on a school night. I don’t get the pleasure of a lie in and I give it two days before the schedule is changed again due to the warm, wet, westerly winds. Writing this blog entry I realise I will be very sad to say goodbye to all the kids, and of course I am glad I will have the kids to say goodbye to. But looking at my calendar I am just relieved that there are only 12 more weeks until I am one that plane home.